A 4 o'clock Tea in the Tower of Shalott

Until recently I thought Homophobia wasn't actually a phobia because it didn't really mean "being afraid of gay people" but rather "just hating gay people for no reason". I thought there are two kinds of homophobes: those who are gay themselves but are afraid to admit it so they envy gay people for having the strengh to be themselves. And those who are just too stupid to think properly, so they just say what they think will make them seem "cool".
But two days ago I thought about it again and came to the conclusion that there is a kind of homophobia that is actually a phobia: namely the fear of losing power. For years, white heterosexual men where the only ones who were privileged to run a buisness, marry whoever they want to, start a family and own a house. Then, women and black/coloured people also got the same rights, so if gay people now also had all those rights, they woulnd't have a lot of people left to look down on. Because, sadly, this is a part of human nature. Humans don't only want to be good, they want to be better than others.
The woman next door doesn't only want big boobs, she wants bigger boobs than her neighbour with the pretty face. The guy in the Ferrari doesnt only want an expensive car, he wants a car thats more expensiv than the Mercedes of his ex-highschool collegue. Humans always want to be seen as better than someone else, because they desire to be admired. But the reason for wanting to be better than others isn't only because of the aim to be admired, but also the simple fact,that people don't want to lose something that is important to them, may it be a thing, person, or the image society has of them.
The woman next door wants bigger boobs, because her husband seems to have an affair with the pretty-faced neighbour. The guy in the Ferrari wants an expensive car so people won't see that his parents were actually very poor. And the homophobe hates on gay people because he doesn't want society to see, that heterosexual men aren't any better than everyone else.

"Beauty is not that important."
That's what a lot of people think, or at least say.
Well, I don't think so. I think, beauty is one of the most important things, if not THE most important thing on earth. By "Beauty" I don't mean the person-being-attractive-beauty. I mean Beauty as something we enjoy and love just for itself, without any reason. Like the beauty of literature. The beauty of a garden. The beauty of music. The beauty of certain feelings.
Beauty is actually what we live for. Every single human being in this world aims towards one out of two goals: Either creating something they consider beautiful or, when they think they can't create beautiful things, the destruction of what other people consider beautiful.
Recently, I saw one of the most beutiful things I've ever seen: a moth was flying around in an empty glass of wine, while just a little bit of light from the kitchen lamp was throwing reflections in the glass.

So, I made a list of things or people I find beautiful:
- Dita von Teese
- The poem "Ghost" by Emilie Autumn
- Valeria Lukyanova without makeup
- The voice of Montserrat Caballé
- Valeria Lukyanova with makeup
- "Paradise Lost" by John Milton
- The voice of Valeria Lukyanova
- The taste of Earl Grey with milk and honey
- The feeling you get while drinking a warm cup of coffee when it's snowing outside
- Driving over the fields by bike while being slightly tipsy listening to Lana del Rey
- Salvador Dalí and his paintings
- Emilie Autumns smile
- Shakiras smile
- Seeing my friends smile
- The feeling you get when you receive a letter from a friend
- Snow
- The smell of Dita-von-Teese-perfumes
- The smell of the "Prime and Fine Illuminating Base" by Catrice
- Getting a hug from a friend

What do you find beautiful? What does Beauty mean to you? Do you see beauty as something important?

Have a beautiful day, Beautifuls :) <3

Hey everyone, again I had a few thoughts I wanted to share with the world.

So recently I was thinking about how I perceive the world. Namely, I never actually think about the things that don't affect me in some kind of way. I think about things that happened to me or people I know or know about, things that will happen to me or them or things that could happen to me or them now or in the future. But I never actually think about the things I don't know about.

For example, in exactly this moment, there are women getting raped, children getting killed, criminals getting imprisoned and dolphins are happily jumping around in the ocean. But as we have no certain image in our head of this happening right now or in the future and as we don't know if it will ever affect us, we probably don't think about it, or at least don't do it often.

My next step was to try to imagine the world as a whole, with all those people, animals, etc on it, all of them minding their business and doing their things. But this didn't work, it's probably just not possible for the human brain to imagine the whole worlds population with all the aspects of their characters all at once. So I thought, if God exists, how does he do that? How is he able to actually look after every single one of us, always knowing what we're doing, thinking and being able to still look after everyone else while trying to help somebody?

Well, maybe he doesn't. Maybe, we are all just part of him and he knows that we exist, but doesnt actually know every single one of us, like we know about the cells our body is made of, but don't actually have a clue about what is actually going on with them, except for when theres something going extremely wrong, like cancer. That could be the reason for so many prayers not being answered and for this world being such a bad place. He doesn't know about everything going on on earth, but for example when Hitler was busy leading wars and killing innocent people, God may have made the right people do the right things to end this horrible episode of our worlds history. In the end a lot of people died, but nazi-germany was beaten, just like when a human being has cancer and you manage to heal it and defeat the cancer, the body still got highly damaged.

Some people say this world is a miserable place and therefore God, if he exists, is a bad person. But I don't actually think so. He just wants us to solve our problems on our own, because he just can't help everyone, we are just way to many people in the world. But if something is going extremely wrong, if the whole world and humanity is in danger, then he will help. Maybe we won't notice, but he will at least try to do so. If he exists, which we can't know.

I hope you enjoyed reading whats going on in my mind again and as always I'm curious to know, what's your opinion on this.
Have a nice day <3